Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Randomize