I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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