some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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