What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm both gender and math confused
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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