you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
