mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
