I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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