3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Randomize
