Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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