Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
