On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
