i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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