Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight

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(847): View more from Illinois

O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.

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(904): View more from Florida

5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

no, didnt close...

(978): View more from Massachusetts

What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(513): View more from Ohio

i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to

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(318): View more from Louisiana

I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.

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(209): View more from California

High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.

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(915): View more from Texas

Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.

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