so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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