I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
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