she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
