His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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