well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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