i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize