ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
hahahahaha turkey breast
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?