how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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