At least make sure they are 18
Why
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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