Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
