Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
