that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
