There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
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