dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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