I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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