Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today

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  (770): I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today http://tfl.nu/te6h
  Replies (41) Good night (5440) Bad night (508)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.

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  (972): I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up. http://tfl.nu/rj29
  Replies (44) Good night (3938) Bad night (714)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together

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  (410): Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together http://tfl.nu/isyr
  Replies (12) Good night (5309) Bad night (1148)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."

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  (612): the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear." http://tfl.nu/uaxy
  Replies (19) Good night (9272) Bad night (915)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.

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  (515): trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point. http://tfl.nu/fff7
  Replies (19) Good night (2456) Bad night (1020)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE

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  (443): the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE http://tfl.nu/nr5v
  Replies (5) Good night (1890) Bad night (891)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.

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  (636): Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time. http://tfl.nu/mfto
  Replies (6) Good night (2298) Bad night (1237)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.

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  (503): I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it. http://tfl.nu/30lr
  Replies (12) Good night (2532) Bad night (944)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns

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  (443): I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns http://tfl.nu/o6of
  Replies (3) Good night (1417) Bad night (657)
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  (626): View more from California

  I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.

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  (626): I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses. http://tfl.nu/ogb0
  Replies (3) Good night (1131) Bad night (479)
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  (650): View more from California

  My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.

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  (650): My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings. http://tfl.nu/futo
  Replies (14) Good night (2155) Bad night (759)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.

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  (216): I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick. http://tfl.nu/pduu
  Replies (9) Good night (514) Bad night (1753)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."

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  (603): I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses." http://tfl.nu/iu6o
  Replies (2) Good night (860) Bad night (238)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina

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  (360): i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina http://tfl.nu/287f
  Replies (18) Good night (322) Bad night (1739)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.

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  (407): What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats. http://tfl.nu/w4l0
  Replies (1) Good night (705) Bad night (346)

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