He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
