I want to make a zoo with you.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
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I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
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He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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