btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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