in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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