evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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