He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
time to smoke my breakfast
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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