He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
