i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
