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• (512): View more from Texas

  Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Jesus knows you're telling a lie.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm

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• (707): View more from California

  I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  There were penises being pulled out everywhere.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (914): View more from New York

  Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.

  (1-401): View more from Rhode Island

  Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  And the results, officer?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She's fucked.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same

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