would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
