Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
So apparently I’m into choking now
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