i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize