Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
