There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
We talked him into tasing himself.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
