I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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