omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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