Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I could fuck to npr.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
