Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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