woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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