i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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