So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
