Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
