so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Randomize
